I was watching a movie and saw an acronym LOLA standing for Lust Often Love Always. It got me thinking about my life. More specifically my love life. Scratch that...my sex life. I have loved long before I ever had sex and my sex life only started nine years ago. I wouldn't say that I was a late bloomer. I was absolutely terrified and CONVINCED that if I had sex before I graduated from high school and moved out of my parents house that either they were going to walk in or find out and I would get in trouble.
I was like every girl. I wanted my first time to be special. I wanted it to be with someone I was head over heals in love with. I did not have those dreams where candles were everywhere with rose petals scattered everywhere. I did not actually care where it happened as long as I felt special and loved the guy I was with. I got lucky!
I met THE guy on November 10, 2002. I was standing outside of a shipmate's house. I was fresh out of boot camp...ten days on my boat to be exact. I'm standing there with my rack mate from boot camp and one of the guys in our department who was showing us around the big city! I looked over towards a group of people and saw him standing there. The moment I set eyes on him I felt it! That rush!
Anyone who has ever fallen in love at first sight knows exactly what I am talking about. You see nothing but that person. You feel the warm fuzzies from centimeters apart or thousands of miles apart. I asked my new shipmate if he knew this guy and if he could introduce me. Again...I got lucky! He did know him...not well but enough to know his name! I was introduced and the moment I heard him speak, he was like a drug and I was hooked!
Everything about him had me mesmerized! The way he walked, talked, smiled, laughed, looked at me and the slightest touch would just make my head spin! We went with my friend from boot camp and our shipmate somewhere and he kissed me in the car. I am pretty sure that I had, like, a permanent smile on my face. Four days later we went out. I don't know where we went but I remember making out in a parking garage.
That night was nothing short of perfect. He knew it was my first time and he made sure that I was comfortable and happy. My only regret (and if you know me, you know that I regret nothing because there's no point) is not having more of those perfect nights.
Now this brings me to the title of my post. Do you believe that it is possible to have only one true love or can true love happen more than once to someone? I believe that every person has someone out there meant for them but that someone may not necessarily be the one that they truly love, if that makes any sense. I have loved with my whole heart multiple times and I do not deny that I have had true love in the past and that it has happened several times. I think there is someone out there that will make me feel whole but is it necessarily the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with? I don't think so...not for me anyway.
I still love this guy with all of my heart. I have thought about him just about every day for the last 9 years. All I want is for him to be happy and I know that eventually he will be fully happy with all aspects of his life as will I. He will always have a special place in my heart. Forever and always.
Until next time