Let's Catch Up

The original title of this post was going to be "Nobody's Perfect..." which would lead to an opening with a video clip from MTV's Girl Code where Nicole says "...except Beyonce..."

Unfortunately I lost my patience while sifting through videos on YouTube trying to find it (btw...you can catch full episodes of Girl Code on YouTube...super fun fact that I might indulge in tomorrow...my second day off this week) and gave up and decided to make this into a little bit of a rant session.  Maybe I'll throw in a couple feel good moments!  We shall see!!

Where to start...ah...remember this post?  Something that I sometimes wish I could forget...why?  Because some guys just suck...and if I were still single (which I'm not...insert blushing moment and super cheesy ass smile) I would have said "because all guys suck ass"...which would lead me to explain that the douche bag I wrote that post about decided to build up my love for him and then just *poof* disappear.  Wanna know my response to that dick move?

This is you @Emperor_of_Beer a coward!!! pic.twitter.com/OCnaciElw0
— Myranda (@Myranda84) July 3, 2013

(and you should totally follow me on Twitter if you're not already...because I have finally found my inner awesomeness and I am sharing it with the world!)

Woman scorned...1...douche bag dick head...0!  Fuck yeah!

Now if you scroll to the comments of that very same post you will find a comment from "Anonymous" professing his love to me.  I know who this man is.  I gave him my heart a long time ago and (this is where it gets a little too girlie for me) he still has a little piece of it.  He will always be important to me and special to me but he told me that he loved me and made me fall in love with him all over again only to shut me out and then not hear anything from him for months...and I text him on his birthday and get a thank you (which totally shocked me) but was followed up by "who is this" a couple days later...asshole party of one?!

Oh and it gets better!  While hanging out with my boyfriend and his roommate this last weekend, I'm checking out my Pinterest app only to see the directly above mentioned asshole has left me a comment on one of my pins that says to call him.

I JUST ABOUT SAW RED!!!  What did I do instead...I stewed on it for a couple of days.  I thought about texting him...calling him never once crossed my mind...so I sent him an email...it was short and sweet and to the point of you suck and you hurt me and I don't know if I can talk to you.  After several revisions that is pretty much the gist of what was sent.  Strangely enough I feel better!

On to the fun stuff!  I am about to totally rock the blogging world with all the cool and awesome shit that I get to do with my boyfriend and his roommate and their friends (that apparently really like me and might become my friends too...because who doesn't want to be my friend...I rock!).

Here is a fun little adventure that we had this last weekend.  If I had pictures I would say be prepared to have your mind blown like the guy at the end of the AT&T commercial with the girl who says "What about infinity TIMES infinity?"...yeah you know which one I'm talking about!

I have to come up with something to abbreviate roommate with because I can shorten "my boyfriend" to "my bf" but "his roommate" to what?  Can you insert hashtags into a blog?  Does that make you a douche?  If not then...Can't figure out how to abbreviate roommate #FirstWorldProblems...if it is a douche move...then ignore what was previously written!

While I mull over that, here is what went down!

BF and I went to my great grandmother's 96th birthday breakfast (which I repeatedly gave him the option to get out of but he went and suffered and survived the crazy and damn it I love it!).  After telling my dad and my grandmother that BF got called in to work and we had to leave, we hit the mall...Game Stop and Barnes & Nobel...I got myself three new books!  On our way home, I texted ROOMIE (eh...not diggin it yet but we'll see if I can come up with anything clever as we go).  BF said that RM (not so much) had really wanted to take his raft out to the lake but he (being BF) was always busy or tired or just plain didn't want to go (his words) but we had a beautiful sunny day, hardly a cloud in the sky, a slight breeze, not too hot but not chilly, so we decided to go out on the lake!

I trust these guys to know what they're doing...I mean BUD (getting close I think) has this raft that easily fit the three of us comfortably...could possibly toss in a fourth person but there wouldn't be a whole lot of room to really move or get comfortable.  The raft had two paddles (I will get to the "had" part in a second) and I was with two dudes so guess who didn't have to paddle!

We ended up floating around for a while and then realized that we were about in the center of the lake...we decided to maybe start trying to head back to where we started which was all the way across the lake now because we didn't want to walk over a mile back to the car...and then BF broke one of the paddles.

We tried to ghetto rig the paddle by using a piece of line to tie the paddle to the oar and BF's flip flop...did I mention that these are plastic oars...and if we would have had some duct tape that shit would have been MONEY!

It worked for about five minutes before coming apart...and as HOMIE (I'm totally not diggin Bud anymore) is trying to MacGyver the paddle, we find ourselves floating dangerously close to the swimming area...which we are then told via jerk face with a megaphone...in a row boat...inside the swimming area...that we are too close to the swimming area and need to keep our "craft" 40 feet away.

With the use of one paddle, we get ourselves more than 40 feet way and at this point we determine that we will never make it back to where we started with only one paddle so we make for the nearest part of shore.  I take the broken paddle and help a little with the rowing...BF said that I helped but I don't know if I really did except to maybe help us stay going straight...which counts for something.

We make it to shore and get out of the water and deflate the raft and make our mile long trek back to the car which took less time to walk back then the amount of time we spent in the raft trying to decide (pre-broken paddle) if we should make it to the car or the nearest dock.

Talk about a fun day!

I'm going to continue to think about what to call Mr. Roommate (since I do not use names...every...although I was tempted to plaster douche bag's name but if you search for @Emperor_of_beer on Twitter, you'll totally find his name.  I will also keep a better record of all the cool and awesome stuff that I do now that I am not single anymore (three weeks and 37 hours, what).

Until next time!

Real Women Vs. Bitches

Pardon my French but women can be crazy bitches!

I know that isn't like a NEWSFLASH or anything but the older I get and the more I talk to my male friends, it just becomes more and more evident that women are psycho!  Let me point out in a ratio of female : male friends, I would have to say mine is probably about 1 : 10...easily.  I do not have very many female friends because I do not like the drama that comes with them...plus (as I stated above) they are crazy!

Case and point from my own experience:

Let me take you back to 8th grade (school year 1997 - 1998).  My best friend was (and still is to this day) a guy.  He was my neighbor and my first "boyfriend" when we were 12.  After he spent all of 7th grade torturing me, I still considered him my best friend.  By torture I mean he did everything from shaving men's deodorant up my locker grates to trying to shut my locker on my head to trying to drop his desk on my head (such violence, right).  Stupid boys and their freaking phases!

Anyway, I became friends with a girl in 8th grade who eventually said that she really liked my best friend and asked if I could get them together.  Being the super awesome friend that I am, I did.  I talked her up to him and he asked her out and they were together for the rest of the year.  The crazy bitch didn't reveal her true colors until Freshman year.

My best friend dumped her over the summer.  She cried to me asking me to find out why he did it and how she could get back together with him.  It was not my place to pry and I told her that I was not going to grill him with questions about their relationship and that if he wanted to tell me why he broke up with her then it would be on his terms and whatever he revealed to me would stay between us.  I would never break his trust.

She didn't like that answer.

We ended up in the same gym class.  They sat us in alphabetical order which put me next to one of my greatest friends (my last name being McCa and her's being McCo) but landed CRAZY right in front of me.  One day while talking to my girl before the teachers showed up, CRAZY kept turning around and either giving me the evil eye or telling me to shut up and stop talking.  My response was "I am not talking to you.  Turn around and ignore me just like I will continue to do to you from now on."  I then proceeded to continue my conversation.  CRAZY continued to tell me that if I did not shut up that she was going to (insert physical violent activity here).  I easily ignored her until all of a sudden CRAZY turned into CRAZY BITCH and was latched onto my arm!

You read that correctly!  She was biting my right forearm.  I think if I look carefully I can make out some teeth marks still.  It didn't even hurt but she left some railroad tracks (from her braces) and teeth marks.  There was a split second when she finally let go that it stung but before I could blink, the feeling had passed.  I sat there stunned and shocked that I was wiping her spit off my arm onto my shorts while everyone around us was sitting there with their jaws on the floor.  It all happened so fast that no one had time to process what was happening and stop her before she let go.

End of that WOMEN BE CRAZY life story.

If you didn't read my last post (check it out here if you want) then you don't know that I recently became unavailable!  Only ten days so far as his girlfriend but this has been the best like 25+ days (that's about how long he has actually been in town) of my life so far...at least that's how it feels anyway and I will totally take it.

I won't share any details of his life and his story except that when he tells me about the way he has been treated in the passed by his ex during their relationship it makes me sad.  It actually makes my heart hurt for him.  He is one of the nicest, sweetest, most wonderful guys I have every met.  He truly is a rare find!  Back off ladies...he is mine and I will take you down if you even think about trying to take him from me...you have been warned!

But it is something that I am hearing more and more lately.  These amazing men are being taken advantage of.  Talk about the tables being turned.  Not to say that we women don't still get used.  A guy makes a girl think that she is special and that she means the world to him and then once he gets what he wants (like sex, for example, or in my case my heart) then he just disappears without a trace leaving her to wonder what she did wrong or how she couldn't see it coming or how stupid she feels for having allowed herself to be played.  But these guys are confessing that they changed to be exactly who their girlfriend/wife wanted them to be and it still wasn't good enough.  She essentially gives her man a list of things that she doesn't like about him or things that he does that she hates and he does a complete 180 and starts acting the way she wants and stops doing the things she hates and she still doesn't care.  She makes zero effort while he has completely changed himself.  It makes me sad.

I want to share something I posted on Facebook the other day (my profile is set to private so I can maintain my privacy to an extent).

"I seriously have the greatest boyfriend ever!  After a really craptastic day, he came up to have dinner and just hang out and watch Netflix with me.  How did I get so lucky?! - feeling lucky"

Here's the response I want to address next:

"If I did that I'd get called lazy...all you did is make dinner and sit on your ass and watch netflix...you can't even take me out..."

That made me so mad and sad at the same time.  I responded to this male friend with:

"All I've ever craved is time and attention.  If my guy makes me dinner or just watches a movie with me then I am happy!  I don't need to go out or have him spend money on me.  All I want is time!"

That is true.  Sure, it's nice to go out and do something BUT  there are so many things to do that do not cost money.  I really only crave his time and attention.  Any moment spent apart makes the moments together that much  more special.  How can anyone put a price tag on time?

Do I like to go out and have fun?  Yeah, who doesn't!

Does going out mean having to go to some fancy restaurant or bar and have my guy drop a ton of money on me?  Absolutely not!

Do I like getting all dressed up to be shown off?  Sure but it takes so long to get ready that I prefer it be for special occasions and not an all the time kind of thing.

Do I want him to hug me and kiss me and hold my hand in public?  YES but I don't need a full on make out or dry humping session in public.

Am I girlie?  Not unless the occasion calls for it.

Do I like girlie things like getting flowers every once in awhile?  Yes...

Do I need to hear that I am needed and wanted and cared about?  Hell yeah!

Does he have to feel like the only way I appreciate him is when he pays for everything?  Not at all...let me pay sometimes...please!

Come on now ladies!  Man up and quit being a bitch.  Let your man know that you appreciate him for everything that he does!  The good guys are hard to come by so if you find one, you better hold on tight before someone else does.  As much as we need to feel needed and wanted, they need to hear it and feel it too.  No matter how macho they try to be.  You have to treat others the way you want to be treated and that is what separates the real women from the bitches!

Until next time!

Did I Get Lucky Or What?!

I have been absent for entirely too long and I know I have said it before but I really do want to write more and not go so freaking long in between posts!  With that said, onward to today's post!

A little over a month ago or so I received a request on Facebook along with a message from a guy that I had met a few times about eight and a half years ago.  He is, like, best friends with one of my really good friends from my time in the Coast Guard.  He tells me in this message who he is (and I vaguely remembered him) and that our mutual friend suggested that he look me up.  He is active duty and received orders to Seattle.  Our friend told him to look me up since I live up here.

We exchanged phone numbers and started texting.  The day after he got here, he came up and had lunch with me.  The second I saw him I remembered him.  He has not changed much in the last eight years.  I mean we have all gotten a little older but the second I saw him standing at his car in the parking lot, I remembered him.  How could I have forgotten his face?

I enjoyed spending my short hour long lunch with him.  The more we texted, the more I found it easier to just be me.  I was able to say anything to him and could just tell that no matter what I said, he would never judge me.  I do not have to censor myself around him.  It is absolutely amazing!

So his first week here I had tickets to a Mariner's game (because they were playing my Cubs).  One of my friends from high school was supposed to go with me so I asked him if he wanted to go.  I also told him that I had a fourth ticket if his roommate wanted to go.  I was all set for a night out when my friend from high school ended up having to back out.  That left over ticket went to my dad.  I was a little skeptic to bring him and his roommate (whom I had never met) around my dad since I do not have the greatest relationship with my dad.  We had a ton of fun and got to watch the first ever fireworks display at Safeco!

I have spent every weekend with him.  I work every Saturday but I get off around 6pm and I have stayed with him.  The first night that I stayed there I had entirely too much vodka and passed out.  He was so sweet and gave me a blanket.  We spent all night playing this card game and while sitting next to him, I stole a glance at him while he was laughing.  He seriously has the most beautiful blue eyes and the way they light up when he laughs.

Last week we went to a Sounders game.  It was my first major league soccer game.  I was so excited!  I actually do not know if I was more excited to be going to the game or that I got spend over 105 minutes with him!  I leaned my head on his shoulder during the game.  Any chance that I could I had to touch him...his arm...his hand...his leg with mine.

Later that night we stopped at grabbed a bite to eat and we were talking.  He was telling me about his family and I can hardly put into words the way he looked.  I was just mesmerized by him.  I could see the pain and the happiness and the sadness and the loneliness.

I already knew that I wanted to know more about him but I did not expect to find that I was developing feelings for this guy.  A man that I hardly know but I am totally and completely drawn to.  I cannot wait to see him again and again.  Every time I get butterflies in my stomach and he just makes me feel good about myself.  He makes it just so easy to be me!

Now for the first time in two years, I am proud to say that I am ready!  I have not been in any place in my life where I wanted to be in a relationship or could be in a relationship but I have finally allowed myself to grow and as of 11pm on Monday, July 8th, I became his girlfriend!!!

I cannot stop smiling.  He makes me blush.  I feel so much happier since he got here.  He has even passed the family test...well part of it!  He has met my dad...my mom, grandma, and youngest sister...and they all like him and think he is so nice.  He had dinner with us last night (well I guess I should say Thursday night since it is technically Saturday now) and stayed and hung out with me for a little while.

I told one of my girl friends about him and she asked me if I thought it was just a fling or something long-term.  I definitely do not see this ending in the foreseeable future!  I love spending every moment with him as I can!  We are hanging out tomorrow night and then maybe possibly going to Ikea on Sunday...YEAH!!!

I know that there will be a whole lot more posts in the future regarding my boyfriend and I smile to myself just typing that word "boyfriend"...because he is mine!  He is MY boyfriend and I could not have gotten luckier than to have such an amazing man be mine!

Until next time!