I swear I have not been slacking on my blog challenge! I have not posted Day 18 to Day 22 yet because my internet SUCKS!!! Seriously! Cannot watch Netflix...which means no "Shameless (UK Original)"...and trust me when I say that it is a MUST! They are freakin hilarious! So far I have only made it like four episodes into it but they are taking the US version and practically mirroring the original...which is so totally awesome!
On top of no Netflix, I cannot check my email...and my phone freaks out everytime I try to check it there. Since I am waiting on a loser to respond to an email I sent him at the beginning of the month from my Hotmail account, I can only check it on the computer because my phone takes WAY too long to download apps now (have I mentioned how much I HATE my Droid 2?). I am trying to avoid talking to him on the phone mainly because I want to keep things civil and if I can do all communication via email then I have time to re-read what I want to say and not sound like a douche myself.
No Netflix...no email...no Facebook. I am actually not too worried about Facebook. I am thoroughly annoyed with the fact that I cannot get the "Most Recent" option on my stupid smart phone anymore though! Drives me NUTS! Then there is the fact that lack of internet on my phone makes it extremely difficult to play "Subway Surfer"...which I have become totally addicted to since my nephew's birthday party this last weekend!
Okay...it is time to sign off and head back to work! Hopefully I can get my posts all caught up tonight...if the internet cooperates! Until next time!
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Thursday, January 17, 2013
UBC Day 17 - Close Your Eyes and Open Your Mind
Even on my days off, I never feel like I get to really relax and do nothing. It always seems like I have something to do. Some errand I have to run...some place I have to go...end up getting called in to work an extra shift.
When I get a day to really just relax and do nothing...I turn my alarm off...I shut my phone off...I wake up naturally. I eventually make my way out to the living room where I curl up in my blanket and watch a few of my shows on the DVR...but honestly I feel most relaxed when I am dancing. When I am practicing my Zumba moves on my own. Creating my own choreography or working on getting a few new dances down. The music just seriously makes everything else irrelevant.
Any worries or stress just melts away as soon as I start the music and start to move. Dance has always been that way for me. I was just in love with New Orleans partially because I could go out any night of the week and the clubs would be packed and playing great music and I would dance and not think about anything else. Sure...being 19 years old and getting into clubs and not being carded buying drinks and shots was fun but dancing is really why I went out. Not to get drunk because I could.
Now that I know that my knee is okay, I have stopped babying it and plan to build that muscle back up and get back into teaching Zumba. I need to dance. I have so much pain and stress that I need a release. If I could not dance, I would run but right now I cannot really do either. However I am totally ready to fully try my choreography that I created in my head and have yet been able to try out!
On the flip side, I also love to curl up next to a window with great light and a good book...a cup of hot coffee and a beautiful view...that is perfection as well! The only thing that could ever make it better is having someone special there with me. To peek up over the top of my book and see someone special sitting close to me doing something similar. Eventually when I get my set schedule of Wednesday through Sunday work week back, I plan to find someplace beautiful and peaceful to go to and read on Mondays or Tuesdays. Who knows...maybe I will walk onto a ferry and go somewhere and use the time and surrounding beauty to refresh my poetry!
How do you unwind? Is there a special place that you go to and relax? Is there a certain activity that just puts your mind at ease? Share your secret you place!
Until next time!
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
UBC Day 16 - Sharing Is Caring
I am not going to make a big deal about sharing this post because it is mainly to vent. The other day I posted a status update on my personal Facebook page about being concerned about someone I love...someone I care about very much. This person is going through a very rough time right now. It is not my place to spill publicly what is going on in his life so I do not share the very little details that I do know. I do not mention his name or anything.
My update was very vague. So much so that it could have been about anyone. This person is similar to myself in the fact that when times get tough, we shut down. That is something that I have been trying to work on but still suffer...it is a huge reason why I lost so many people when my ex and I went through our divorce...because I did not want to talk about it. I did not want pity. If I wanted to talk about it, I would seek out the person I wanted to talk to. That hurt me in the end.
Going back to the second sentence in the last paragraph...it could have been about ANYONE. Have you ever been worried about someone? Have you ever posted a status update about it on Facebook? Do you post those things looking for pity, kind words, negativity, or just to vent? What gets me is when people jump to conclusions and throwing out negative comments when they do not know what is going on.
How do these people know that I was not talking about my cousin? My uncle passed away a couple of months ago from a car accident. How do these people know that my cousin and I could have gone from talking every day to all of a sudden him shutting down? They jump to the conclusion that it ALWAYS has to do with my love life.
The person that I was talking about means a lot to me. I love him. I care for him. I cannot imagine what he is going through and I just wish I could be there for him. Anyone who knows me, knows that THAT is the kind of person I am. Hell, I am going to school for Psychology. I am a good listener. I love to be there for my friends when they need someone...even if they just need someone there and do not talk.
Next thing I know, I am being bombarded with comments from people telling me to "move on", "he is not worth it", "you deserve better than that", etc. I can respond to those with vague answers but I ended up deleting the post after someone who used to be a really good friend of mine wrote a novel of a comment. I only remember a few parts but the part that sticks with me is when he said to imagine it to be me in that situation and how I would feel.
I was in that situation. Two years ago. I did the same thing he is doing. I shut down. I did not talk to my friends. I did not talk to my family. I stayed away from Facebook and Twitter and my only escape was taking or teaching a Zumba class or some other fitness class at the gym I worked at. I had no one I could trust. I had no one I could turn to. My ex turned to everyone we knew and told lies...which he apologized for...too late of course because the damage was already done.
Even through all the hurtful and hateful things that he put me through...leaving me with nothing and taking everything...at the end of the day, I hoped that in the end that he would eventually find happiness. I lost everything. I lost my house...my "family" (because that is what you get in the military...not friends...but family)...my dogs...my financial stability...my ability to take care of myself. I was left with no other option but to move back home. Something I never wanted to do. I live with my mom. I am freaking out because there is a possibility that my sister might be moving in this summer depending on where she gets in for her Masters program and I might be out of a place to live.
So I know what it looks like from his eyes. I was accused of some of the same things he has been accused of...as far as I know, my ex did not cheat on me...just accused me of doing so. All I ask is that if you have something that you want to comment on, before you hit "enter" or click "post", re-read it. If it sounds like it could be construed as negative, cut it and paste it into a message. Make it something private. That way you do not look like an inconsiderate jerk and people that really have my back do not jump down your throat and defend me...because that has happened...and I love them for it!
I cannot see it from her eyes because I would never and could never do what she has done. I am not a typical girl. The things that get to most women tend to roll off my back. Case and point...my ex husband spent like $600 at a strip club...my exact words to him after he told me how much he spent were "...and how do YOU feel about that?"...followed by a laugh. Just remember the old saying of "Think before you speak"...except "Think before you type/comment". Any negative comments will always be deleted.
Until next time!
My update was very vague. So much so that it could have been about anyone. This person is similar to myself in the fact that when times get tough, we shut down. That is something that I have been trying to work on but still suffer...it is a huge reason why I lost so many people when my ex and I went through our divorce...because I did not want to talk about it. I did not want pity. If I wanted to talk about it, I would seek out the person I wanted to talk to. That hurt me in the end.
Going back to the second sentence in the last paragraph...it could have been about ANYONE. Have you ever been worried about someone? Have you ever posted a status update about it on Facebook? Do you post those things looking for pity, kind words, negativity, or just to vent? What gets me is when people jump to conclusions and throwing out negative comments when they do not know what is going on.
How do these people know that I was not talking about my cousin? My uncle passed away a couple of months ago from a car accident. How do these people know that my cousin and I could have gone from talking every day to all of a sudden him shutting down? They jump to the conclusion that it ALWAYS has to do with my love life.
The person that I was talking about means a lot to me. I love him. I care for him. I cannot imagine what he is going through and I just wish I could be there for him. Anyone who knows me, knows that THAT is the kind of person I am. Hell, I am going to school for Psychology. I am a good listener. I love to be there for my friends when they need someone...even if they just need someone there and do not talk.
Next thing I know, I am being bombarded with comments from people telling me to "move on", "he is not worth it", "you deserve better than that", etc. I can respond to those with vague answers but I ended up deleting the post after someone who used to be a really good friend of mine wrote a novel of a comment. I only remember a few parts but the part that sticks with me is when he said to imagine it to be me in that situation and how I would feel.
I was in that situation. Two years ago. I did the same thing he is doing. I shut down. I did not talk to my friends. I did not talk to my family. I stayed away from Facebook and Twitter and my only escape was taking or teaching a Zumba class or some other fitness class at the gym I worked at. I had no one I could trust. I had no one I could turn to. My ex turned to everyone we knew and told lies...which he apologized for...too late of course because the damage was already done.
Even through all the hurtful and hateful things that he put me through...leaving me with nothing and taking everything...at the end of the day, I hoped that in the end that he would eventually find happiness. I lost everything. I lost my house...my "family" (because that is what you get in the military...not friends...but family)...my dogs...my financial stability...my ability to take care of myself. I was left with no other option but to move back home. Something I never wanted to do. I live with my mom. I am freaking out because there is a possibility that my sister might be moving in this summer depending on where she gets in for her Masters program and I might be out of a place to live.
So I know what it looks like from his eyes. I was accused of some of the same things he has been accused of...as far as I know, my ex did not cheat on me...just accused me of doing so. All I ask is that if you have something that you want to comment on, before you hit "enter" or click "post", re-read it. If it sounds like it could be construed as negative, cut it and paste it into a message. Make it something private. That way you do not look like an inconsiderate jerk and people that really have my back do not jump down your throat and defend me...because that has happened...and I love them for it!
I cannot see it from her eyes because I would never and could never do what she has done. I am not a typical girl. The things that get to most women tend to roll off my back. Case and point...my ex husband spent like $600 at a strip club...my exact words to him after he told me how much he spent were "...and how do YOU feel about that?"...followed by a laugh. Just remember the old saying of "Think before you speak"...except "Think before you type/comment". Any negative comments will always be deleted.
Until next time!
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
UBC Day 15 - How Many Hats Do You Wear?
Today is National Hat Day. You can take my title question to mean physically how many hats do you wear or how many "hats" you wear. I have my "big sister/step sister" hat, I have my "Auntie Randa" hat, "daughter" hat, "favorite grandchild" hat (ha...and we all know that I am Grandma Buddy's favorite...and we all accept it!), etc.
This post is not about those kinds of hats though...I picked three of my hats that I love to share with everyone! I do not have all of my hats unpacked right now BUT you make due with what you have right?!
This is my winter work hat. I could not tell you were I got it...or who gave it to me if it was a gift. It came with a matching scarf too! I wear three shirts to work...put my scarf on...add my Columbia jacket with the fleece lining and this hat...oh and toss in a couple of those hand warmers for me to wear inside of my gloves...and I am set!
I swear this hat is clean! This is my other work hat...you know...for when it is not freezing outside! I am actually in dire need of a new one! Might invest in one after payday! This hat has most definitely seen better days...by the way...it is a BLACK hat...not a brown one...and those brown spots only came about AFTER it went through the dish washer!
I cannot figure out why this picture is only coming out sideways when I took it just like I did my work hat. Anyway, I bought this at the Anheuser Busch Brewery in St. Louis, Missouri. It even has the Bud Light logo on the back. I fell in love with it! "Wally's Diner & Gas Station...Eat Here...Get Gas!"
Show me your favorite hat! I really want to see it! Be it an actual hat or a picture of you with your children in your "Mom/Dad" hat...you get the drift! Until next time!
This post is not about those kinds of hats though...I picked three of my hats that I love to share with everyone! I do not have all of my hats unpacked right now BUT you make due with what you have right?!
This is my winter work hat. I could not tell you were I got it...or who gave it to me if it was a gift. It came with a matching scarf too! I wear three shirts to work...put my scarf on...add my Columbia jacket with the fleece lining and this hat...oh and toss in a couple of those hand warmers for me to wear inside of my gloves...and I am set!
I swear this hat is clean! This is my other work hat...you know...for when it is not freezing outside! I am actually in dire need of a new one! Might invest in one after payday! This hat has most definitely seen better days...by the way...it is a BLACK hat...not a brown one...and those brown spots only came about AFTER it went through the dish washer!
I cannot figure out why this picture is only coming out sideways when I took it just like I did my work hat. Anyway, I bought this at the Anheuser Busch Brewery in St. Louis, Missouri. It even has the Bud Light logo on the back. I fell in love with it! "Wally's Diner & Gas Station...Eat Here...Get Gas!"
Show me your favorite hat! I really want to see it! Be it an actual hat or a picture of you with your children in your "Mom/Dad" hat...you get the drift! Until next time!
Monday, January 14, 2013
UBC Day 14 - Changing Seasons
It is flipping cold outside and let me tell you what...I might be FROM the great Pacific Northwest but I do not BELONG in the Pacific Northwest. I do enjoy having seasons...Rain (Fall)...Cold Rain (Winter)...Rain (Spring)...Little Sun (Summer). Right now I am stuck in the cold rain season...where sometimes it is really cold (like this weekend where I swear my core temperature dropped like 15 degrees just so I would not freeze to death)...sometimes it is rainy...and sometimes it is freaking cold and rainy and windy and miserable!
I do not belong up there. I know that it rains a ton in the spring and summer in parts of the south but I miss it terribly and I really want to go back. I am really close to jumping at the opportunity. It does not hurt the fact that the man that I love with all my heart and soul is from the south and lives in the south...and wants me to come to him. I just cannot drop everything and leave...not yet anyway!
I favorite season is Fall. I love the changing of the leaves. The reds, oranges, and yellows!
I took that picture on a 21 day road trip I took with my ex husband...How can you look at a picture like that and NOT love Fall?!
Until next time!
I do not belong up there. I know that it rains a ton in the spring and summer in parts of the south but I miss it terribly and I really want to go back. I am really close to jumping at the opportunity. It does not hurt the fact that the man that I love with all my heart and soul is from the south and lives in the south...and wants me to come to him. I just cannot drop everything and leave...not yet anyway!
I favorite season is Fall. I love the changing of the leaves. The reds, oranges, and yellows!
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| Old Mission, Idaho 2010 |
Until next time!
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